HOW THE FUCK IS THIS WOMAN 60 YEARS OLD?

Okay so we know that it's totally unfair to follow an Adele post with someone this hot, but y'all can't deny that Christie Brinkley is one smokin' hot bitch considering the woman is 60 years old! The supermodel was papped walking the pink carpet at an event for Barbie (she doesn't look THAT young) and lady was a force to be reckoned with. She flaunted her shit hot curves in a slinky Victoria Beckham number and we literally think she had the carpet sweating. Who in God's name is this woman's plastic surgeon?

[Image via GETTY]

THAT'S NOT WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL...

Now don't get us wrong cause Harry Styles is a good looking guy with great eyes, lips and bone structure, but man does he need to revaluate his skin routine cause the boy looked like a pizza face when he stepped out recently. The lead singer of band One Direction was seen out with friends and we're not sure if we should look away or try and play Dot To Dot with his acne? Anyhow we're sure that with some Proactiv his skin would clear right up so get on it quick boy.

[Image via BIG PICTURE]

CRUELLA WOULD TOTES NOT HIRE THIS

Looks like another hair and make-up queen has got it in for actress Joely Richardson cause lady was looking weird at a recent product launch in London. The sister of the bird who died in a skiing accident (very sad no BS) was papped walking the red carpet and her hair looked fucking rank to say the least. The woman's only in her late 40s but looks so much older with the dated attire and horrendous makeover. Better luck next time Joely!

[Image via CONTACT MUSIC]

WE PREFER THIS THING AS A WOMAN

Now we've never been big fans of drag queens cause to be quite frank they scare the living shit out of us, but in the case of RuPaul we think it's safe to say it looks better as a chick. The elderly homo was seen walking the red carpet for his new book release the other night and he looked like a walking skeleton with AIDS. Seriously what's going on with that jawline buddy? It's kinda shocking how bad and fucking sick he looks without all the drag crap he usually sports.

[Image via LOGO TV/WENN]

WE CAN'T STOP...HATIN' ON THIS FOLLOWER

For some reason we've never liked Miley Cyrus cause she looks like a cunt who'd deck you in the school cafeteria for giving her the wrong look. Anyway the singer who achieved fame through her hick daddy was snapped working the red carpet at a promo event for her new album in LA recently and the woman looked a fool. The hair was all wrong and does she think she's black now with that grill? Someone needs to tell the bitch that the rock chick look she's sporting doesn't work when you're from a family who plucks chickens for dinner. We can't tell whether she's a young star in Hollywood or a dyke from Norway who owns a tattoo parlor, but what we do know is that it's trying way too hard and looks lame.

[Image via REX FEATURES]

SPONGE BOB WAS ALWAYS A DIRTY GAY

We gotta admit that Tom Daley is TOTES one of our many illegal crushes (we feel like pedos) and it seems even Sponge Bob can't keep his animated hands (and tongue) off his hot torso. What we wouldn't give to be the pool this thing dives in...preferably minus the Speedos.

[Image via NICKELODEON/GETTY]

HOW IS GOD REAL IF THIS SHIT HAPPENS?

Do y'all remember watching Tarzan and paying more attention to Brendan Fraser's rock hard abs (bulge) than the shit storyline? Well fast forward almost 15 years and this is what it's become...chubby, pasty and oh so NOT hot. Such a shame when hoy guys let go of themselves cause how else are they going to gain respect in the world without their killer looks? Anyhow aside from the thinning hair, muggs (man juggs), beer belly and Muppet-like face, we'll give him credit for at least covering up cause  that torso without coverage would be a sight for sore eyes. Oh and is it just us or does he look like he enjoys gay kiddy porn?

[Image via WARNER BROS/WENN]

MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL...DON'T VOMIT!

Oh dear honey. Jocelyn Wildensein seems to have had some more procedures done if this photo is anything to go by. The bored rich bitch was seen arriving at a charity gala in NYC recently and apparently some kids even screamed and said they thought cats had two legs. Ouch that's gotta hurt Jossy but what'd you expect when you look like a fucking extra from The Lion King? Those eyes and lips are truly horrendous and her surgeon def needs to have his license revoked cause this is now way beyond a total joke.

[Image via FLYNET]

WE WONDER IF ANTONIO STILL PORKS THIS?

Oh dear what have you done to yourself honey? Hollywood actress (senior citizen) Melanie Griffith left her gaff the other day and it's blatantly clear that she's still refusing to accept the fact that she's not 25 anymore. The over the hill star has long been a fan of the surgeon's knife, but if a surgeon butchered out lips and gave us filler like this they'd get a fuck off massive lawsuit on their hands. Why oh why do you keep doing this to yourself Mel?

[Image via SPLASH]

EVEN HANNAH LOOKS BETTER THAN THIS SHIT

Bless her! We love us some Lena Dunham but the other day it was papped arriving to the set of Girls and it looked a total dyke mess. It's common knowledge the girl ain't no looker, but we're more puzzled as to why it's such a pig at only 26 years old? Do girls these days not understand that in order to achieve happiness and get hot guys they need to be a size 10 max? Like we said we love her creative genius but not eating would help.

[Image via PACIFIC COAST]

PRINCESS FIONA AIN'T AGING TOO WELL FOLKS

Once again we're reminded that time is a CUNT because just look at what Mr. Gravity's done to poor Cameron Diaz. The once hot actress was seen running errands around LA the other day sans slap and it looked rough as arse holes to say the least. Gone is the stunning face and in it's place is a tired looking mug resembling your average Plain Jane. It makes us sad but money clearly can't buy everything.

[Image via NEW LINE/FLYNET]

HAPPY HOUR IS FROM FOUR TO SIX!

You all surely remember Mrs George aka Regina's drunk as fuck mom in Mean Girls? Well fast forward almost 10 years (yes you're getting fucking old) and this is what it's become. Amy Poehler was snapped shopping for food (not alcohol) and it looked like it'd gone up by at least 3 dress sizes which is such a shame cause being skinny really does equal happiness in life. The glasses look more like a comedy gab, but they are in fact worn for improving her vision. We say go back to being bulimic and wearing Juicy Couture velour tracksuits cause it's so LA chic a la 2004.

[Image via PARAMOUNT/SPLASH]

AGE JUST AIN'T BEEN KIND TO PRINCESS FIONA

Oh dear sweetie this one was taken from a "bad angle" for sure right. Cameron Diaz was seen out to dinner in LA over the weekend and we literally can't believe this is the same girl who gave every guy boners in The Mask cause bitch is looking seriously haggard these days. The actress has got some serious jowls going on and we never realized how plain it was minus all the slap, but hopefully she'll be good for a few movies before she throws in the towel.

[Image via WENN]

EVEN A GREMLIN WOULDN'T FUCK THIS

Oh dear honey, did you come straight from killing Bill or something? Uma Thurman who used to be semi attractive was papped walking the streets of NYC looking for more rich guys to get pregnant by and the bitch looked fucking butters. Since hitting a goldmine with her latest baby daddy the actress doesn't seem to wanna work much anymore, but then again if you were wiping your ass with $100 bills would you? On a more serious note, we would like to offer our condolences to anyone who was involved in a car wreck whilst driving past this mess.

[Image via INF]

EVEN ROSEANNE HAS AGED BETTER

Surely you all remember the annoying bitch sister from Roseanne called Jackie? Well if you look at the left pic of actress Laurie Metcalf when she looked let's say manageable without vomming, you can see that the past decade and a bit haven't been kind to the poor bitch cause it's become a right dog. The rank hair, clown face and teeth ain't gonna help this lady get any action anytime soon. Give yourself a makeover honey cause you need one.

[Image via ABC/WIRE]

WE DON'T WANT U BACK HONEY

Sometimes the young and fresh Cher Lloyd can look really cute, but lately she's been looking like a fucking ugly sister that thinks she's a punk. The trashy X Factor finalist who's currently working like a bitch to get her SHITE music heard was seen arriving for a morning show in NYC recently and it looked a total mess. The rank red hair matched her lips (not a good look), her complexion was riddled with pimples and for someone that's just 18 she's got a fair amount of wrinkles. Even if you're a fan (cause she pays you), you can't deny that she looks a state here.

[Image via BIG PICTURE]

DID YOU FART HONEY?

You gotta love Nicki Minaj cause the bitch has made a good career out of looking a total mess and rapping shit no one can understand. The erm singer made an appearance on Good Morning America recently to promote her new record and it looked as though the poor bitch had done a nasty fart mid song. The piss colored hair and hooker outfit did her no favors either, but at least it's another star who ain't promoting anorexia. Listen up Alexa (dickhead) Chung.

[Image via SPLASH]

STACEY SLATER HAS GOTTEN ROUGHER

Lacey Turner who used to play common as muck Stacey Slater was recently snapped mucking out her driveway and looking rough as hell. The actress (holding laughter) is more likely to be found working a shift at New Look these days, as all the acting work appears to have dried up. Bad times for Lacey but you think she'd step out looking a little more camera ready no?

[Image via INF]

MORE LIKE SLAGGER JAGGER LOVE

Why is it that only rough as fuck people seem to win The X Factor...well most of the time? Cheap as chips Cher Lloyd was snapped popping out to her local offy to get some fags the other day and she looked dog rough to say the least. Let's not forget to mention that this bitch has only just turned 19 yet looks like a slapper in her late 20's. The lovely Scouse brows, mahoosive conk and spotty complexion looked a right state and this gal is in desperate need of a make-under. She strikes us as the type of girl who would cut you if you look at her sideways.

[Image via FLYNET]