BITCH PLEASE DON'T TWERK, YOU AIN'T SEXY!

Someone needs to seriously give Miley Cyrus the memo that says she is plenty of things but sexy just ain't one of them. We'll give credit where it's due though cause bitch has got a nice little body on her, but besides that there ain't much else going on for the skank. The face on it is evil and coupled with those teeth she ain't got no fucking chance at finding true love. Please just put the tongue away, hang up the microphone and go work in a zoo cause that's where you belong.

[Image via GETTY]

YOUR FACE LOOKS LIKE A WRECKING BALL

Oh dear that ain't a good shot is it honey? Miley Cyrus was sporting one fuck off nasty hairdo the other day while on a classy cig break around LA and boy did the bitch look retarded. The singer wasn't really rocking the bowl cut well and looked more like a boy in drag than a pop star. We just don't see the fuss with this one cause not only is she butters but her voice is shit too. Just sayin'.

[Image via SPLASH]

PICKING UP THE PIECES...OF BROKEN MIRROR

Now for some reason ginga singer (she does try) Paloma Faith just fucks us off cause the bitch has got the kinda face that just puts us in a bad mood. We're guessing she already got the Google alert on herself and is reading this and if so please just stop trying to sing and go work with animals honey. Those fucking evil teeth and birds nest hair are making us gag and we're not sure if it's got a third tit or something, but that dress is either fifty sizes too small or bitch needs to be in the Guinness Book Of Records. Just sayin'.

[Image via XPOSURE]

THIS IS MORE ANNOYING THAN RACHEL ZOE

What did Brad Goreksi think he looked like when he checked in the mirror before leaving to host the AMA's last month is what we wanna know? The celebrity "stylist" or Canadian import that attracts wealthy fag hags was seen on the red carpet with his microphone at the ready and he looked like a gay beaver who was trying too hard. The hair looked like a wall of steel and we never realized he had such huge fuck-off ears. Canadians already get a bad rep as it is, but Brad being one certainly doesn't help.

[Image via ABC]

DOES SHE THINK SHE'S FROM HACKNEY?

Miley Cyrus seems to be very confused lately as she's dressing like she's London trash from Hackney's east end, as opposed to the Ozark skank from hickville that she's so ashamed to actually be. The singer (if auto-tune counts) was papped strolling around LA on a shopping spree and it just looked a fucking state. We know it's young so she's trying out different styles and shit, but have you ever seen such a lame ass try hard in your life? Get your cowboy boots out of your closet Miley and embrace your southern (incestuous) background.

[Inage via X17]

THERE'S NOTHING ELSE WE CAN SAY

Lady GaGa has always striked us as a try hard that clearly got bullied for being Italian in high school, so it's no surprise that as a grown ass woman she dresses like a dickhead to get attention. The weird ass singer was papped leaving her hotel in Germany recently and she looked like a fucking idiot if we're honest. Just cause she's draped in vile couture sure as hell don't make her fashionable or cool in our eyes, but her fans or "little monsters" aka fags who like beaty music seem to eat this shit up like brownies. We're just waiting for her 15 minutes of fame to run out so she can go work in a deli in the East Village and spare the world of her fakeness.

[Image via ISO]

WHO IS THIS BITCH TRYING TO KID?

Oh ain't Alexa Chung just the picture of health! Now the only thing that pisses us off more than a wannabe fashion icon, is one who actually believes they're relevant. The triple size zero "model" (dickhead) was papped walking the streets of NYC recently with what appeared to be a packet of Cheetos and a can of Coke in her hand. Erm sorry but is this bitch having a laugh? If it's weight is anything to go by then the only coke this thing has seen is the type that you keep on a CD case. Oh and holding a packet of chips is like calling us all fucking idiots. Did we mention that we're not really a fan?

[Image via BIG PICTURE]