PIGS ARE DIGGIN' MAGALUF THIS YEAR...

At least it's half covered up right? Gemma Collins aka the walking walrus from Essex was papped on vacay with her fellow dumb ass buddies in the culture filled island of Magaluf and once again it looked like a stick of butter playing dress-up. The reality TV fatty was seen walking (yes walking) around her resort and according to a source people fell off their sun beds due to the mini earthquake-like sensation. Oh the embarrassment to cause such situations huh? We can't even imagine how sweaty this bitch's muff must of got from being abroad. Ya major fucking ew.

[Image via SPLASH]

PREGNANCY SURE AIN'T MAKING IT GLOW

If you've been keeping your fingers on the Kim Kardashian radar lately you'll notice that it ain't looking too good whilst preggers. The reality TV slapper was seen around LA eating in the streets and pulling several retarded facial expressions. We wonder if the reason behind her appearance is that she did a sick burp and some oatmeal came up, because yes even food doesn't wanna be near a Kardashian people.

[Image via X17]

LOOKS LIKE COUSIN ITT MOVED TO ATLANTA

We guess that some people will just never learn to look in the mirror (or at least buy one) before they leave the house and this does seem to be the case for the trashy as hell Kim Zolciak from Real Housewives Of Atlanta, but secretly we hope she never learns cause we love that she's a state. The reality star can be seen in an exclusive sneak peek preview into the new season of the hit Bravo show and as always her wig and it's quality looks uber questionable. We can see that she's not ditched the tacky and so 2003 nails either.

[Image via BRAVO/MGM]

THIS MUST BE THE WORLD'S TRASHIEST MOM

It's hard to believe that such a classy bird like Katie Price could be single, but low and behold she recently split from her boyfriend of erm around three months and already it was back out trying to score more cock. The glamor model who proudly takes it up the ass was papped leaving several clubs around London in the wee hours and it looked a right state to say the least. Her tits are practically being used as a chin rest at this point and even drag queens apply their slap better, however the one nice thing we can say is that she's got a bangin' tum for shitting out four kids. All the obese bitches who had one kid 8 years ago should take note and stop fucking eating. Put your tits away though honey cause it ain't a good look.

[Image via FLYNET]

LOOKS LIKE IT'S FREEZING IN LA FOR ONCE

It's common knowledge that Khloe Kardashian is the ugly duckling (bless her) of the Kardashian clan so the above snap of it really ain't no surprise if we're honest. The reality TV star (tranny) was papped en route to the gym and it looked fucking rough what with the flat ass hair, bad complexion and potato head. Oh and erm what's with those fuck off coat hook nipples honey? We'll give her some points for her Celine bag but even that's unoriginal aka LA style.

[Image via FLYNET]

LOOKING THIS CHEAP SURE DOES COST

Doesn't the humble Tamara Ecclestone just look the picture of class here? The billion dollar heiress was papped walking around a casino in Las Vegas over the weekend and she was dressed to the nines (as a hooker) for her evening out. The cheap looking frock, orange tan, suffocated tits and clown make-up resembled a Monet painting aka a fucking mess. That lovely foot tattoo is just the perfect finishing touch too.

[Image via CRUISE]

EVEN NEW JERSEY ARE EMBARRASSED

We get hundreds of requests to feature Jersey Shore's infamous Snooki on The Sizzling Mess but until now we never quite found the right photo. The reality TV skank was papped at some shitty launch recently and it looked like a bottle of fake tan had raped the bitch. It's become known as New Jersey's most famous midget and she's famous for her garish make-up and crazy outfits, but we're pretty sure that even the trashiest of states (Jersey included) are embarrassed by the connection. We bet there was a lovely missing chunk of foundation when she removed her headband. Can you say classy?

[Image via WIRE]

WE LOVE US SOME VINTAGE HOUSEWIVES

We bet the "lovely" Kim Zolciak and NeNe Leakes were slightly embarrassed when these pics of them back in the day surfaced recently. It would seem that the classy housewives (trailer trash skanks) weren't so camera without the $$$ but Kim does look a lot fresher, however NeNe just looks weird. Fast forward about 30 years and they both scream trash and new money so well done ladies!

[Image via BRAVO]

LOOKS LIKE MISS PIGGY WORKS OUT

We can't help but feel sorry for Khloe Kardashian cause let's face it when your sister is Kim Kardashian, aka a famous walking sperm bank, you must constantly be reminded that you're fugly. What's even worse is that her other sister Kourtney, who has slight down syndrome features, still looks hotter than her. Anyway the unlucky in looks sister was papped leaving the gym in LA the other day and shocked onlookers with her make-up free complexion. Poor old Khloe looked like a pig in need of a spray tan and we're still unsure as to whether or not she hides the sausage. What do you think?

[Image via SPLASH]

DID SHE SHIT HER PANTS?

Nene Leakes aka the bitch bully from The Real Housewives Of Atlanta really ain't a looker is she? The reality star was interviewed on TV and looked more like a pig in drag than a fierce housewife. We're not feeling those ridiculous earrings and when is she gonna get rid of that $5 hooker wig? Also, did she fart or something during the interview cause she looked like she smelt something nasty and was gonna barf?

[Image via BRAVO]

WE'D PUT MONEY AND CUM ON THIS SHIT

The world often wonders what Kim Kardashian would stop at in order to get press, but we think that even she'd go for the above if it secured the right amount of column inches. Oh and let's not forget the right amount of dollars for that CLASSY mother Kris Jenner. To be honest, we think it shows Kimmy in a perfectly honest light cause she is a whore that gets her pussy out for fame, so why not continue cashing in on this example? We're just wondering if we should of made the cock black seeing as she's fucking Kanye now? Come to think this is her we're talking about and we wouldn't be surprised if she had a couple more guys on the go.

[Image via WIRE/THE SIZZLING MESS]

AS ALWAYS SHE'S A CLASS ACT

Just when you thought Kim Zolciak couldn't get any trashier she goes and does something like this. Apparently she thought it'd be romantic (actual quote) to have her husband's football shirt painted onto her naked body as a gift. We have to say that even this is a new low for The Real Housewives Of Atlanta star who always seems to look like a cheap hooker in drag. Overall it just isn't a good look honey, cause that mammoth wig is raping your head and your titties are hanging too far south. All we can say is thank God this isn't our mother.

[Image via BRAVO]

ME, MYSELF AND A DOG

That's right people, even Beyonce has days when she looks like a car crash. Don't matter how much money this bitch has got cause she looked rough as arseholes when she nipped out for dinner with Jay Z in NYC recently. We know she just shat out her kid so we should be easier on her, but fuck it she's got enough money to look her best every second of the day and we don't like laziness. Not so hot without the glam team are ya love?

[Image via SPLASH]

THIS BITCH SMELLS OF SEX

We just had to post this snap of Kim Kardashian cause the team at The Sizzling Mess actually got boners from looking at it. What is it about about the reality TV star (slut who knows how to make a buck) that always looks so cock ready? Like we've said before sometimes we throw these "stars" a bone and do a nice post and we just couldn't resist on this occasion. We know good ole Kimmy would endorse adult diapers if the amount was right, we know every woman (including the mother) is both fame and money hungry, but it looks like being a dirty whore definitely pays the bills.

[Image via FLYNET]

I'VE BEEN RIDING (CONVICTS) SINCE I WAS 7 YEARS OLD

No, this isn't an unpublished image from The Muppets archive, it's class personified Real Housewives Of Atlanta star (pig) Phaedra Parks. There's a lot to look at here, but we think it's safe to say that Donatella Versace spent the night at Phaedra's, drank way too much and then threw up everywhere in the morning. After being puked on it looks like she borrowed one of Donatella's STUNNING (disgusting) Versace blouses (albeit 30 sizes bigger). Don't forget to really study her FLAWLESSLY applied make up by the way. Urgh, everything about this photo screams "new money" (or no money) and it looks like a poor-man's Buckingham Palace on a VERY tight budget. Wait hang on though, what is Donatella Versace doin' in Atlanta?

[Image via BRAVO]

LIFE & STYLE WHORE

Whenever we think about our favourite celebrity hot mess, we always seem to forget about the stunning natural beauty of Kim Zolciak. The CLASSIEST Real Housewives Of Atlanta star was pictured lunching in her native Georgia (note the classy placing of a cigarette lighter and glass of wine), but she looked more like an extra from The Rocky Horror Picture Show. We think it's safe to say that whatever "look" she was going for here was clearly a drag queen. The hair (Smiffy's wig), clown make up, VILE French Manicure (a la Posh Spice circa her WAG days) and new money watch just scream "I'm an uncultured hick who has a show on Bravo." Sorry sweetie, but this is just one major hot pile of MESS!

[Image via PEACH TREE POST]