100 BUCKS SAYS THIS THING TUCKS IT...

Okay so we've never really gotten the deal with Ellie Goulding and why people like her so much cause her voice sounds like a child with a sore throat who's trying to hit different notes but failing. The erm singer was seen leaving a studio in London last week and minus the fuck off huge cock hanging between her legs (we totes didn't add that), she was once again sporting that nasty jawline. We at The Sizzling Mess like our women to resemble women and we've never been overly keen on a bird with a strong jaw if we're honest. It don't even have hips, has chunky calves and those guns seem quite well defined so we're just saying we'd like to be a tile on her shower wall to see the truth. What do you all think besides the fact that we're evil cunts?

[Image via SPLASH]

WHEN GOOD PEOPLE WEAR BAD OUTFITS!

You gotta love Sandra Bullock cause for one thing the woman looks great for almost 50 and secondly she adopts black kids and not just for publicity. Hear that Madonna? The actress walked the red carpet the other day at the Golden Globe awards and unfortunately for her it seemed her stylist may be holding some sort of grudge cause she looked like a Liquorice Allsort gone wrong. It was a crying shame that such a great actress rocked up looking like a fool but hey hopefully she hired the bitch who dressed her and has hired a fairy who can get the job done well.

[Image via GETTY]

CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS IS BEYONCE'S SISTER?

Come on guys let's face it cause poor old Solange Knowles doesn't really stand a chance when Beyonce's her sister. Although she's a less annoying and not a diva bitch it really ain't something we like to look at for too long. We get that she's embracing her natural hair and giving the finger to weaves, but we think the presence of one would actually soften up her mannish features. Like we said she puts out some cool tunes but that fuck off strong jaw is making us think something else is between it's legs.

[Image via SPLASH]

HOW THE FUCK DID THIS EVER GET ON 90210?!

This poor bitch has to be one of the most unfortunate looking birds out there and we really don't get how Tori Spelling ever landed a role on Beverly Hills 90210 in the first place...oh yeah cause her dad created the show. The funny looking actress was papped doing her weekly grocery shop in LA and looked butters as usual bless her. You think she'd at least get her roots done seeing as she wipes her shitter with 50s no?

[Image via XPOSURE]

WHO WOULD APPLAUSE FOR THIS MESS?

Oh dear what happened here Lady GaGa? The songstress was seen arriving at a radio station in LA the other day to promote her new gayer than life club tune and looked like a fucking state. We're not sure what the look is for this new era, but we think it's safe to say that even regular clowns will be offended by this shit. The way this bitch dresses does nothing to convince haters that she was in fact born with a pussy and not a fuck off dick. She could of at least finished the look off with a daisy in her hair and clown shoes no?

[Image via WENN]

MORE LIKE JENNIFER MANISTON RIGHT GUYS?

Okay so we've never really understood the fascination with Jennifer Aniston cause let's face it; she's an average actress who got lucky at best and while she can sometimes look cute we've never been a fan of a woman with a strong jaw. The former FRIENDS star was seen filming a new movie in NYC over the weekend and sported a wig that made onlookers do a double take cause lady resembled a full on dude in drag. The only thing missing from this clownish look was a five o'clock shadow, but at least we know that Jen can't pull off every hairstyle out there. Did you clock her fuck off massive engagement ring too? Must be nice to have lots of money ennit.

[Image via SPLASH]

THIS BITCH HAS DEFINITELY GOT A THIRD ARM

To be honest we don't actually hate that much on Florence Welch, but we firmly believe that it hides a fuck off sausage between her (or his) legs cause those feet do not belong to a woman. The singer was papped strolling the streets of London looking for a surgeon to chop off her man meat, but it returned home unlucky after every surgeon said they don't touch ginga cock. Ouch that's gotta hurt Flo...or should we say Fred? Anyhow it made plenty of dough from those shit records so hopefully someone will agree to the op soon. On a side note those fucking cheekbones could cut glass and look VERY feminine. Best of luck honey...or should we say dude.

[Image via FLYNET]