100 BUCKS SAYS THIS THING TUCKS IT...

Okay so we've never really gotten the deal with Ellie Goulding and why people like her so much cause her voice sounds like a child with a sore throat who's trying to hit different notes but failing. The erm singer was seen leaving a studio in London last week and minus the fuck off huge cock hanging between her legs (we totes didn't add that), she was once again sporting that nasty jawline. We at The Sizzling Mess like our women to resemble women and we've never been overly keen on a bird with a strong jaw if we're honest. It don't even have hips, has chunky calves and those guns seem quite well defined so we're just saying we'd like to be a tile on her shower wall to see the truth. What do you all think besides the fact that we're evil cunts?

[Image via SPLASH]

GATSBY WON'T FUCK YOU LIKE THIS HONEY!

Oh dear this ain't a very good snap of Carey Mulligan is it people? The posh British actress was papped arriving at LAX with her Mumford & Sons hubby and bitch looked rough as shit. We had to do a second take at first cause we couldn't actually believe she was this plain minus the slap! What the hell would Leo say to this people?

[Image via PACIFIC COAST]

YOU CAN'T HAVE BRAINS AND BEAUTY

Oh dear honey, are you prepping for another Mummy role or do you just look this butters minus the slap? Rachel Weisz was seen shopping in LA over the weekend and although the actress always looks cock ready on the red carpet, she looked more like a fugly Jew troll on this occasion. Weird looking thing though ain't it? We also noticed how creepily skinny her ankle is too...and this bagged Daniel Craig?

[Image via SPLASH]

WE BET KATE'S FUCKED OFF ABOUT THIS

Kate Beckinsale is one of England's hottest exports, however it seems that Allure magazine thought the actress needed a lot more airbrushing than usual. To say they'd gone overboard would be putting it lightly, as it appears that the retoucher either hates Kate or was drunk on the job. Gone are her beautiful features and flowing locks and in it's place are horse teeth, retarded eyes and birds nest hair. Complete and utter Photoshop fail if we're honest and the stylist needs sacking too.

[Image via ALLURE]