YOU AIN'T NEVER GONNA BE COCO CHANEL!

Liza Minnelli gets a lot of heat from us but if you look like this then you're bound to be our favorite hot mess. The campy singer was seen attending a charity event in NYC the other night and judging by the above snap she was trying to channel Coco Chanel and failed miserably as per usual. The dressy hat, curled sideburn, fake beauty mark and excess pearls screamed drag queen and as usual the deluded star thought she'd looked a million dollars. You've gotta love hot mess fag hag who thinks she's the shit though!

[Image via GETTY]

DAMN IT LIZA YOU WERE SO CLOSE THIS TIME!

Okay y'all know that we LOVE us some Liza Minnelli but at the Oscars on Sunday the campy singer rocked up wearing a blue ensemble (notice the blue hair steak too) and yet again slightly missed the mark. While we can't deny her hair and make-up looked damn fine for a old broad who's close to 70, the fact that she forgot to wear a bra which showed off her massive erect nipple kinda ruined the moment and made onlookers gag. We also can't deal with the shoes cause they make her look like she's got a dodgy club foot. Anyway we totes thought Liza brought her A game, but as always the humor crept in again cause we just can't take her seriously.

[Image via AP]

IF SHE CAN MAKE IT THERE...ANYONE CAN!

Liza Minnelli really does prove that even the most butters bitch on the planet can achieve worldwide fame and even though you may be laughed at for being so hilariously campish and ugly, who gives a fuck when you're worth in excess of $50 million right? The iconic fag hag was snapped performing in her best at a charity event in NYC the other day and the poor thing looked like a tranny clown with a gammy eye to say the least. Now we get that dressing like you're from the 60s can be cool if you're young, hip and cute, but when you're an munter who limps cause you've got a dodgy hip...it ain't so great. On the other hand we love us some Liza cause the bitch is totes cray!

[Image via PACIFIC COAST]

THE CAST OF 'FRAGGLE ROCK' TOUCH DOWN

Poor old Liza Minnelli never really stood a chance in life with that face, but despite looking like the back end of a bus she went on to have a successful singing career (beyond us) and star in campy musicals. Now obviously having Judy Garland as your mom doesn't hurt and we're pretty sure that the poor woman would turn in her grave if could hear how this bitch knocks out a tune. To be honest a cat getting gang raped with Parkinson's disease comes to mind. Even the butters tranny Tubbs from TV show The League Of Gentleman does a better job as passing off as a chick...pretty embarrassing ennit. Do you think Liza farted too cause that airport worker looks as though she's sniffed something that's making her gag?

[Image via NPG]

WHY OH WHY DO GAYS CARRY BIRKIN BAGS?

Ew we really can't bare to look at the above snap of Johnny Weir too much cause it totes grosses us out and we ain't homophobic but he just looks wrong on so many levels. First he needs to figure out if he even wants to be a dude cause those thighs are rivaling Vicky B's pins and the boots, bag and eyebrows (oh the eyebrows people) just make us cringe inside. We just don't get what it is people?

[Image via FLYNET]

LOOK AWAY, YOU'LL CATCH HIV PEOPLE!

We are not we repeat NOT homophobic for anyone out there who's too sensitive, but when this munter of a being aka Perez Hilton left his gaff the other night to attend some shite event we just had to make it a post. Sorry but it should actually be illegal to look this ugly and he literally looked like he was carrying the HIV virus. To think that this has adopted a kid too...the poor thing don't stand a chance.

[Image via PEREZ HILTON]

THE ONLY GAY WHO ISN'T BOTOXED TO DEATH

Seeing as Graham Norton likes to dip his pen in the homosexual ink pot, we just assumed it was standard that he'd have a totally unexpressive face filled with botox, but apparently this isn't the case as it was seen wandering around London recently looking bloated as fuck. The TV host was seen leaving his gaff and it looked as though the poor bastard had lost 50 stone around his eyes what with the saggy shopping bags underneath them. The depth of those forehead wrinkles are almost deep enough for us to move into as well. All that money and this face...what's wrong with this picture?

[Image via MEL]

HIS LOOKS SURE AIN'T GOT THE X FACTOR

Simon Cowell has definitely got a nasty tongue on him and we're pretty sure that if he saw this shit even he wouldn't be able to hold back the criticism cause he looked a fucking mess. The music mogul stepped out in LA recently and looked like a bloated whale covered in fake tan. Maybe he's had some help from the surgeon's table seeing as he's suffering from a little facial swelling? Whatever it is, we just think he needs to come out the closet and soon.

[Image via SPLASH]