WE CAN'T FEEL THE LOVE TONIGHT FOR ELT...

Poor old Elton John was finally snapped out shopping in LA the other without his famous round spectacles and let's just say we now get why he wears them all the time. The campy legend was seen browsing a wig store (shocker) in the Hollywood area and we're hoping he was planning to replace the dodgy rug he was papped wearing. What's going on with that bloodshot eye though and you'd think with all his dosh he'd get those eye bags removed wouldn't you?

[Image via GOLDEN EYE]

PATSY WOULD'VE HAD SOME WORK DONE...

This is quite hard for us to write cause we do love a bit of Joanna Lumley cause she's got that slight Meryl Streep legend edge, but fucking hell the bitch was looking rough recently whilst filming a new movie in NYC. The actress was papped with curlers in her hair and a full face of slap, but that did little to disguise her inch deep wrinkles and nasty yellow teeth which were practically screaming to be whitened. Whatever though cause we still love her but it'd be nice if actual talent would try and preserve their looks ennit.

[Image via SPLASH]

BEING MURDERED IS BETTER THAN THIS!

Seriously what the fuck happened here love? Angela Lansbury is the LEGENDARY fierce bitch who portrays weird talking detective Jessica Fletcher in the classic TV show Murder, She Wrote but lady weren't looking so fierce the other night. The talented OAP was papped walking the red carpet at some charity event in NYC and although bitch is nearly 90, which is why we'll ignore those fuck off wrinkles, her make-up artist clearly wanted to show her up that night. What could of been an opportunity look shit hot turned into a disaster and Angie ended up looking like a clown in drag. Who knew Mrs. Potts could've been a dude?

[Image via GETTY]

BITCH LOOKS LIKE A SCIENCE PROJECT

What the fuck does Madonna keep doing to her ever changing face? The slutty Queen of Pop (maybe 20 years ago) was seen at the recent Chime For Change concert in London and looked like a puffy OAP whilst stood at the microphone. We know the bitch is forever on the move what with her erm career, work-outs and plucking Lourdes' fuck off eyebrows (and no doubt bush), but you think she'd of at least touched up her roots no? Oh and nice touch trying to fool yourself your young by wearing gloves, but you're a coffin dodger honey just learn to deal with it already.

[Image via GOFF]

THE DEVIL WEARS FUR ENNIT

It took us a while to realize that it wasn't just the windy weather that was raping Anna Wintour, but she'd also been cream pied (not the dirty kind) by PETA protesters in Paris over the weekend. According to sources, the fur loving Vogue editor freaked out and yelled "No, too many calories!" as she wiped the Cool Whip off her face. The poor bitch looked like she'd been cummed on as she was snapped making a STUNNING facial expression. We really wanna chuck her a (fashionable) bale of hay to nosh on.

[Image via REX FEATURES]