GRAMMY FOR THE MOST UNRECOGNIZABLE...?

Seriously what the ACTUAL fuck Madonna? What in God's name have you done to your face and bitch would you please just ditch the grille already cause it ain't even cool to copy Hannah Montana with an STD...that's right you know who. The alleged queen of pop was snapped walking the red carpet at the annual Grammy awards...with a cane can we add, but we're told she only needs to do this when it's damp cause it makes her dodgy hip play up. Anyhow fellow gay icon and singer Cyndi Lauper presented an award at the show and looked equally strange to be honest. Both of their faces are puffed up and bloated beyond recognition and we just don't understand how they think this looks good. Such a shame when you know you're career is slipping like quick sand and you can't do a thing to stop it cause you ain't relevant. Bad times for Madge and Cyndi ennit.

[Images via AP]

WHEN GOOD PEOPLE WEAR BAD OUTFITS!

You gotta love Sandra Bullock cause for one thing the woman looks great for almost 50 and secondly she adopts black kids and not just for publicity. Hear that Madonna? The actress walked the red carpet the other day at the Golden Globe awards and unfortunately for her it seemed her stylist may be holding some sort of grudge cause she looked like a Liquorice Allsort gone wrong. It was a crying shame that such a great actress rocked up looking like a fool but hey hopefully she hired the bitch who dressed her and has hired a fairy who can get the job done well.

[Image via GETTY]

WHAT A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MAKES!

Holy shit balls people! Christina Aguilera rocked up to this years AMA's looking shit hot compared to the disaster of a dress she turned up in last year. Initially we thought her overall look last year wasn't that bad, but after comparing it to this year she looked a total orange mess. The trampy singer scrubbed up damn well for the event and looked like she was revisiting her throwback glam look...let's just hope she keeps the weight off.

[Image via GETTY/SPLASH]

OMGEEE CHRISTINA, IS THAT ACTUALLY YOU?

Holy shit is literally all we thought after seeing the above snap of Christina Aguilera and can you blame us? We loved to hate on Xtina when she was a flubber but it seems this flower has bloomed and decided it don't wanna be obese no more, cause lady SHUT IT DOWN over the weekend. The songstress was seen on promotional duties at an NBC gala on Saturday for the new season of The Voice and not only did she look totes amaze balls, but he body was OOC! Even though she was rocking her usual trailer trash look, bitch worked it as she looked like a hot teenage slut who didn't make the cast of The Hills. You can finally see your feet again...go Xtina!

[Image via JUST JARED]

VICKY TOTES PAID THIS TO STAND BEHIND HER

We do love a good shot of a celeb with a retard fan in awe and this one is a fucking cracker. Victoria Beckham aka Vicky B was papped at the recent Glamor Awards collecting her gong for best designer or some shit (such a joke) and the poor mong behind her wasn't quite as camera ready. To be honest if you look closely it just goes to show that obesity is becoming quite the norm amongst young girls in the UK. Don't they get that if they wanna be happy in life they need to be a size 8 and below? Oh we do love the thing on the left though, but it's pretty clear that she ain't had any...ever.

[Image via BROAD]

THE AWARD FOR UGLIEST COUPLE GOES TO...

Beth Ditto is kinda cool in the way that she really doesn't give a shit about fashion or having a healthy heart, but on the other hand she's just an obese pig. The lead singer of Gossip was seen attending some shit event with an Asian queen for a date and the pair of them looked truly butters. If you look too closely it looks like he's gonna eat you and we don't understand why Valentino agreed to dress Beth unless she paid for the shoes herself. Is it just us or do you think Jessie J would look like this if she was obese too?

[Image via GOFF]

RED CARPETS SHOULD HAVE WEIGHT LIMITS

Now while we just LOVE us some Melissa McCarthy, bitch just did not look good when it walked the red carpet at the Oscars on Sunday. The funny lady is either partially sighted or she seriously fucked off her stylist cause it looked like a pile of lard thrown into a trash bag that'd been competing in a car race. Regardless of whether they failed miserably and even though her dress was clearly crying at the seams, we do admire how they tried to conceal her pussy fat with that cleverly placed fabric gathering It's such a shame when bad outfits happen to good people but shit does happen people.

[Image via GETTY]

XTINA FINALLY BOUGHT A NEW MIRROR!

What a difference a day and hairstyle can make to one's appearance huh? Christina Aguilera was seen arriving at the American Music Awards in Los Angeles this evening and lady looked SHIT hot for once whilst walking the red carpet. It looks like Xtina finally realized that less is more (especially in her case) and we're so thankful she ditched those period colored extensions in favor of something more simple and classic. Yeah, we never thought we'd use those two words in the same sentence as her name either. Keep it up bitch!

[Image via JUST JARED]