DENISE IS ON THE RIGHT TALK SHOW

What a classy gal that Denise Welch is huh? The mother and TV presenter (slapper from Manchester) got her baps out whilst in the Big Brother house and it looked a right fess (fucking mess). On top of the tranny make-up, rank tits and beer belly, she simply proved that she's always been the slapper we thought she was. According to inside sources, she also got spit-roasted whilst in the hot tub, but Big Brother had to edit this out as they thought it may be too risque to broadcast. It would have boosted ratings though surely? Oh well, we suppose seeing a pig get gang raped isn't that hot anyway.

[Image via BIG BROTHER]

LOOSE WOMAN AND CRAP ACTRESS

Classic beauty Denise Welch was pictured out to dinner in Skegness last night looking like a fuckin' panto reject. The chat show host (alcoholic) took a break from her Loose Women duties to treat herself and her toy boy to dinner at Wetherspoons, and we think she may have forgotten that Halloween was almost a month ago. She looked like a slapper from the north in drag, but we hear that money is tight these days for Denise so at least she made an effort. Still a dog though.

[Image via FLYNET]

FREE WILLY'S YOUTUBE DEBUT

Holy FUCK balls is pretty much all we have to say to the above video. Now we know it's not nice to lower people's self-esteem for kicks, but we physically CANNOT hold back when it comes to this MESS of a being. We kinda liked it's singing but we're not sure it's breathing properly to best support those beautiful notes. We're guessing that maybe a Big Mac is lodged in her throat or something? We know she's just a kid/beached whale, but Ke$ha better watch out cause it looks like this fitch (fat bitch) means business! According to the rumor mill she'll be going by her professional name Lady Lard and her new album Blow Hole is out later this year. We wish you all the best love!

MR TRY-HARD HENRY

For someone like Henry Holland who tries so hard to be edgy, we found it highly amusing when we saw him with an Hermes bracelet around his wrist. The lame Eastender (Manchester native) has always puzzled us when it comes to his ON TREND fashion choices. We swear he's worn the same pair of jeans, brogues (clown version) and denim jacket for the past 6 years. Oh and let's not forget the bow tie...SO freakin' edgy! Someone might wanna tell him, but when you start doing fashion shows and collaborating with "high-end" stores like Debenhams, you might wanna make it look as though your "collection" wasn't made with a glue gun near Old Street. My phone just rang and Quagmire from Family Guy wants his jaw back.

[Image via REX FEATURES]