WHAT WORLD ARE YOU LIVING IN MARIAH?

Okay so it's well known that Mariah Carey always employs a body double or just airbrushes herself to shit on her album covers but this one takes the fucking cake. Everything about her body on the left has been digitally altered and then on the evening that this photo was released she was dumb enough to wear a skin tight black dress to her album launch party which of course revealed the truth. Mariah has always been a foodie and we're guessing that getting into that black dress was like trying to put toothpaste back in the tube. The poor woman needs to realize that she's a big bird and just live with it or she should just starve herself like Xtina.

[Image via DEF JAM/SPLASH]

DREAM LOVER HAS BECOME CAKE LOVER...

We honestly don't get what goes on in the kitchen of singer turned beast Mariah Carey these days. The high note songstress was papped leaving her apartment in NYC yesterday and judging by her fat ass cheeks it looked as though she'd been back on the pies again. Seriously did someone just inflate her head cause it looks fucking huge? At least she kept her massive tits and thighs hidden cause we know MC loves dressing like a whore, although it doesn't work when your body resembles the frame of a pig honey. Just pick a side like Nicole Richie and Kirstie Alley have and stay there!

[Image via AKM/GSI]

ALL THAT $$$ AND IT'S STILL CHEAP AS FUCK

Poor old Mariah Carey can never quite seem to get it just right in the class department cause despite having a personal fortune of almost $600 million she still looks like a $2 hooker in drag at times. MC was snapped knocking out a tune at the recent BET awards and appeared to have taken some major inspiration from Jessica Rabbit. It's kinda awkward when a cartoon wins in the sexy stakes though and the seams on this dress must've been screaming for help.

[Image via SPLASH]

GOOD LORD YOU SURE AIN'T BEAUTIFUL!

Holy shit balls, Mimi is one hell of a yo-yo dieter that's for sure! Mariah Carey was snapped leaving a TV studio in NYC this past week and it looked totally different from her latest music video featuring fellow singer Miguel. Gone was the flowing shiny hair, hot body and skimpy outfits and in it's place was a frumpy fat average mom (we know we'll get hate for that but fuck it) with a bad 80s perm. We literally don't get how this bitch can go from looking so hot to a complete mess who needs to go back in the time machine.

[Image via X17]

IT'S NOT 1994 ANYMORE HONEY...

Mariah Carey always seems to look like she's stepped out wearing her 90s wardrobe and with the new addition of that FABULOUS perm it just steps the look up to a whole new level of cheap. The singer who's famous for communicating with dolphins was papped leaving Louis Vuitton in Aspen over the holiday season and looked like a right gypsy mess in her checkered jumpsuit. It also looks like Mimi is slowly but surely returning to her flubber self as it was looking ever so slightly chubs again. Such a shame seeing as she lost a ton of weight when she shat out her kids, but even money doesn't curb junk food cravings.

[Image via AKM]

1994 CALLED AND IT WANTS IT'S PERM BACK

Oh honey, what the fuck have you got on now? Mariah Carey was snapped vacationing in Aspen over the weekend and it looked like she'd got stuck in a time machine. Is it just us or does poor Mimi always looks cheap and tacky no matter what she wears? The perm, ON TREND outfit and weight gain just looked plain bad and we think it's about time she hired a stylist who isn't related to Stevie Wonder.

[Image via BIG PICTURE]

YOUR DIET IS A HEARTBREAKER

Okay well first of all Merry Christmas from The Sizzling Mess! Second of all, what the fuck is wrong with Mariah Carey? She has FULL ON let herself go lately and we're not letting it slide just cause she shat out twins recently. The talented vocalist (fat singer) was performing an MTV Christmas special, but according to insiders she just wanted to show off her new weight loss. Erm this is where we're confused though...we don't see any. She may as well have worn a t-shirt with the words "fallen from grace but in denial", cause she looked a HOT fuckin' mess. Back in the day Mariah gave a toddler a boner, but these days she's looking more like an alcoholic (note the wine glass) stripper who does stand-up to pay the bills. Oh and the double chin, sweat and ghetto jewelry did nothing to help.

[Image via REX FEATURES]

ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS A BIG MAC

We are severely confused over at The Sizzling Mess. We DO NOT understand how diva pig Mariah Carey STILL hasn't shifted any of that baby weight? The whale/drag queen was pictured performing a TV special in honor of Obama (yes he's unfortunately still the President) and frankly she looked like she still had another couple babies to shit out. To top it all off, we learned that her stylist couldn't even find her a dress that fit, so they took desperate measures and bought 300 meters of red lace and voila you have the STUNNING creation seen above.

[Image via GETTY]